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"Newspapers always excite curiosity. No one ever lays one down without a feeling of disappointment."
Charles Lamb, 1833


"Frankly, despite my horror of the press, I’d love to rise from the grave every ten years or so and go buy a few newspapers."
Luis Buñuel,
Spanish filmmaker



"I often wonder what future historians will say about us. One sentence will suffice to describe modern man: he fornicated and he read newspapers."
Albert Camus,
French novelist, dramatist, philosopher, 1956

All The Pardhan Ji’s Men

S P Singh

Poor old dead Gurcharan Singh Tohra! All his life the man was known as Pardhan ji, even when he was defeated by such political pygmies as Kirpal Singh Badungar. The man made a name for himself for remaining the uncorrupted and perhaps even incorruptible Akali, stuck to his stand in his tiff with Parkash Singh Badal, stood for some time for the supremacy of Akal Takht, remained in political wilderness till he ensured the defeat of Badal and his party in 2002 even though his own All India Shiromani Akali Dal did not win a single seat. Then he even tried taking away the control of the SGPC with some proxy help from Amarinder Singh’s regime but failed. 

Soon Badal needed him, hassled as he was by Amarinder Singh. The problem was that some around Tohra also wanted to encash the profits likely to emerge from a Badal-Tohra clasp. The “unity” happened. It decimated Tohra nearly completely.  

Now that Tohra has been dead for a few years, and his name not even recalled in this election, just have a look at what happened to his sipah-salars. Manjit Singh Calcutta was shown the door by Badal as he seemed to send signals of having a mind and an aspiration of his own. Karnail Singh Panjoli was sidelined and became an odd voice. Tohra’s permanent shadows and spin masters Malwinder Singh Malhi and Gurdarshan Singh Bahia became foot soldiers in Amarinder Singh’s commander-in-chief Bharat Inder Singh Chahal’s battalion of spin masters and advertising planners. Prem Singh Chandumajra finally swallowed pride (wisdom too?) and merged his party with Badal’s for the Lehra Gaga ticket and a Dirba crumb. Inderjit Singh Zira was left in the pits. Good old Sukhdev Singh Bhaur waits quietly in the queue, hoping that some day Badal will throw a glance sideways which he will catch. After all, Avtar Singh Makkar personifies the benefits of waiting quietly.  

Mahesh Inder Singh Grewal used to take the credit for unity. He was fielded from Payal. 

Fate answers many a dilemma. It is not known whether the Calcuttas, the Mahesh Grewals, the Chandumajras, the Malhis and the Bahias ever faced a dilemma, but the February 27 results showed that fate certainly answers. You just have to wait. 

A Tohra-loyalist losing to a progeny of late Beant Singh in Payal is a fate that will sear the great Akali leader’s soul, but does it bother Grewal? Defeat may sadden him, not the convulsions of Tohra’s soul.  Chandumajra lost to Bhattal in Lehra Gaga; even his Dirba crumb was snatched away by Surjit Singh Dhiman of Congress. Calcutta is forced to join forces with Congress-tagged Paramjit Singh Sarna and Malhis and Bahias will have nowhere to go except in the direction that Chahal points.  

Was Akali unity a panthic unity? And pray! What did those who helped bring about such a clasp gain? 

And we had almost left out one Harmail Singh Tohra who lost in Dakala. To be fair, he was the only one who remembered during the campaign Gurcharan Singh Tohra, the man who always slammed politicians for puttar-moh, the son-love. Maybe Harmail did so, because he was a son-in-law. All the Pardhan Ji’s men!

February 28, 2007

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Albertans & Eskimos 

In 1932, William "Bible Bill" Aberhart, the radio evangelist-turned-politician, gave the province of Alberta (in Canada) the world's first Social Credit government and began instituting a series of misguided economic policies - among them the distribution of so-called prosperity certificates: free money with which Albertans were to stimulate the economy (then in the throes of the Great Depression). Needless to say the plan merely left the province with a massive debt...

In 1936, Aberhart reluctantly granted an interview to the editor of the Financial Post. "We Albertans are the richest people in the world," he declared. "We have three billion tons of coal in this province. What do you pay for coal in Toronto? Ten dollars a ton? All right, if we were to capitalize our coal at $10, we'd have $30 billion. There are 700,000 people in Alberta, so figure it out for yourself how wealthy each Albertan would be if we capitalized our natural resources."

The editor promptly deflated Aberhart's argument by pointing out that, in Toronto, he paid fifty cents for a block of ice - meaning that if the ten thousand Canadian Eskimos were to capitalize their own natural resources they would be far richer than Albertans! 

(Sources: Douglas Fetherling, Broadview Book of Canadian Anecdotes)

 
 
 

 

 

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People everywhere confuse what they read in newspapers with news. But, if words were invented to conceal thought, newspapers are a great improvement of a bad invention.  Click on any below to find out:


New York Times
The Washington Post
The Guardian

The Telegraph

Beirut Daily Star
Boston Globe
Moscow Times
The New Yorker
Al-Ahram Weekly
Arab News
Dawn
Al Jazeera
The Hindu
The Indian Express
The Asian Age
The Tribune

 
     
 

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The Corner
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Political Animal
Three Quarks
Sounds and Fury
The Reading Experience
Counter Punch
Exquisite Corpse

 

 

     
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